Summarising the last few days, it seems that overall nobody has a Scooby Doo what is going on, with the Dow hitting its highest level on record at an intraday high of 18,873,6.
Here's some light entertainment instead.
Please note that:
(a) this is obviously tongue in cheek, not serious, and
(b) definitely do not watch this if you are offended by swear words.
Amazingly enough, this still applies more than 2.5 years on...